Be You.

So it's been about a month since I took my break from blogging. Which is so weird for me and feels like it's been much longer. After taking the time to sit on it I've decided to quit this blog. I think I might keep it up a little bit longer... but eventually I am going to delete it. However the past few days I threw together a new place to share my story. I've thought about just staying here and starting fresh, even deleting all my past posts...but no. I have made a new blog that is self titled... which I think works because that is what I want my blog to be about.. me. On FATW I posted things about fashion, pinterest, and all that jazz.. and those things are great but that is defiantly not what I am about. I'm honestly the last person whose interests are about fashion. This is coming from a girl who practically lives in yoga pants and t-shirts. I'm not crafty... like at all. It amazes me how people come up with the things I see on their blogs. I found myself just trying to write posts that I thought my readers wanted to read, like crafts/fashion/cool music/whatever... I found myself not having fun at all with my blog anymore. It felt to me more like a chore. I hate chores.

With this new blog I'm still unaware of what I'm totally going to start blogging and writing about but I know for sure it's going to be about things I love...whatever that may be. I haven't found that certain thing in my life that I am extremely excited about, mainly because I'm still young, and it's constantly changing, but trying to do what everyone else is doing definitely wont show me where I need to be going. So I'm just going to go for it and see what happens.

Many of you reading this are probably thinking okay, good for you but I don't really care. I'm just sharing my thoughts on this because I've notice a lot lately in the blogging community that people are stressing out about their blogs. Two of my favorite big blogs posted about how they have thought about just up and quitting their blogs. I feel like some of us just feel this invisible pressure that our blogs need to be this certain way, and that we need a certain amount of readers, and post about certain types of topics that will please other people. Well, I've stopped thinking this way because it's stupid. I started blogging for fun and for some reason that changed to blogging about how I thought I was supposed to blog.

I feel like I'm starting to rant, so basically to cut it short I'm blogging for me now, for fun. You can follow along if you would like..and if not that's great too. You can find my new place here.

I know many people will not like my blog because it's not the typical blog style, the music I like isn't what you care for or my life isn't as exciting as some people think it should be. That is totally okay because a lot of the things I love not everyone else does. But that's what so awesome about it because it's me being myself. I'm pretty sure I would be completely fine with blogging about whatever I want and having fun with it and having no readers than having tons of readers and not enjoying what I'm even writing about. So this is me saying screw this, I wanna have fun!

If any of you actually take the time to read this long, drawn out post I am sorry, just needed to get this out there. I hope you know why you are blogging and that you truly enjoy it for your own reasons. If not, maybe you should stop and think about who you are as a blogger and if you are being you.

Thanks for everyone who has followed this blog and been totally sweet and kind! You guys are awesome.

-K

Hi, I'm Alive

First off I want to say, yes... I am alive! It has been exactly 14 days since my last post and for me that seems like a lifetime ago. I wanted to explain why I took a blogging break and what's going on with me and this blog right now.

To be honest, I have been feeling this way with my blog for more than just the past two weeks. I have found myself tired, burnt out, and a little stressed out about things happening in my personal life and with this silly little blog. I know, I am stressing about a blog (because I am weird like that) but I wanted to share about this because I feel like it isn't just me who sometimes feels this way.

I love blogging, really love it. It has become my newest hobby and I love finding and meeting all the wonderful people in the blogoshpere. Seriously though, some of you guys are super talented, creative, stylish, funny, witty, awesome bloggers and seemingly perfect. And it has me second guessing myself. Silly I know, because I should never compare myself with someone else but it's hard not to at times. What I think my real problem is is that I am still so young and I haven't really figured out who I really am... and it's frustrating to me. If you read my blog you know I am OCD about everything. Lately, I can't help but obsess over the fact that I feel like my blog is all wrong. Totally not me and I've really tried to figure out what is.

Another thing, I feel like I am somewhat lying to you guys on here. I feel like I act like my life is super great and perfect and it's not. Some people don't really like personal blogs but I feel like mine might become just that, because I think it's weird that I try to play off like I am super happy all the time and my life revolves around my kitty and cupcakes.  I want to be real with you guys, I want to stop posting about things that I really don't have that much interest in. Based on your input and comments with some of my posts, I find that I keep doing posts similar to what you guys like, even if I don't really care for whatever the post is or if I am even interested in the certain subject...which is weird because I should be posting about what I love on my blog, not what you guys love. I don't blame you guys at all... I've just always been a people-pleaser... which I am really starting to dislike about myself. I just feel like I am being a phony sometimes...which isn't cool.

...Another weird thing about myself is that I feel like I should whip out blog post every day. Which for me while I am in school is really hard. There is no rule saying I should post nearly every day but some part of me thinks it's like, some kind of rule that if I don't follow I am being a bad blogger. Again, it's my blog and who am I trying to please? Me!! Gosh, sorry this is such a silly rant. And I realize I am still a baby blog. I only started back in October and a part of me feels like I am doing something wrong because I don't have the largest readership... but I know that kind of thing takes time. And honestly, that shouldn't even matter anyways! (lol)

My biggest problem I think is that I compare. I can't help but to compare my blog to all the greats. I feel like they have influenced me to do more of what they're doing and not what I really want to be doing. When this is happening, in my head I am yelling to myself, "Well, be yourself!" but it's hard for me I guess. It's hard for me to find my own unique voice in blogging but I want to change that. Like, today!

Right now in my personal life, things are just weighing me down and I have been feeling so stressed and I am someone who hates stress. It's hard for me to handle. I hate even saying things like this on here because I know all of you have stress and your own problems but I guess this is just me being totally honest and a little venting (sorry guys, you don't have to keep reading!). So with my real life stress and my silly blog stress I am just a Debby-downer these days and I hate that! I guess what I am trying to get across from all my rambling is that I am going to be taking a break from blogging. I just feel like I am putting out low-quality posts and I'm not okay with that anymore. I thought about shutting down the site until I was ready again, but I want to keep it up. I might post here and there but eventually I know I will start up again when I know what I want because I do love what the blogging community has to offer and you guys are just so awesome. I don't know how long the break will be. Maybe a week, maybe a couple months. I really want to figure out what I want to accomplish with my blogging and I really want to quit being so OCD about everything (I swear it's like a disease). I am still reading blogs but I think for mine I am just going to do a few posts here and there until I know what I want to do.

So sorry about this giant, rambling mess of a rant. I think I just needed to get that said and out there. Phew, feel a little better already. Right now as I finish writing this I am not sure if I even want to post this mess. But who knows, maybe some of you are going through something similar. Maybe not. I don't want you guys to think of this as me asking for a pity party... that's the last think I meant by this. I just needed to say what has been on my mind for a while and let you guys know I still love blogging, I just need a break! Okay, I think I am finished rambling away... this got a little more personal than I anticipated but I hope all of you out there are doing okay. I love you guys and you have all been really kind to me!

<3 Love You All

-K

Handmade Laptop Sleeve

Last weekend I had the best day spending time with my grandma. We spent the day making a Homemade Laptop Sleeve which I found via Pinterest and found a great tutorial from The Cottage Home. It was simple enough for me to follow along and my grandmother sewed it up no problem.

I used the chevron fabric that I thrifted a few weeks ago and I think it came out perfectly. We didn't have the exact material for the lining like the tutorial used, so we improvised. It was funny really, because we used the measurements like the tutorial said and since we had to use a different liner it ended up being too small for my laptop. Grandma was so baffled to how she let herself make such a mistake. But it all worked out because with the smaller laptop case she is going to add a strap and make it a small bag. So after we had the little mishap, we made sure to get the right dimensions and breezed through the steps. I love my new laptop sleeve and it was pretty easy to do and it cost me a total of 3 dollars and two buttons! Again, to see the tutorial for yourself you can visit The Cottage Home where there are tons of great DIYs!

Happy Sunday everyone... it is a lazy day over here. Everyone is napping and lounging around, windows open, birds chirping! Still can't get over this amazing weather!

-K

Currently

Obsessing over: Spring Weather! Finally, the cold and cloudy days are coming to an end and the sun is out and the trees are blooming! I honestly hate the cold because it seems to make me glum and depressed. But now, oh the weather in Missouri is perfect. This whole week is averaging about 79 degrees and I am soaking it all in. Everywhere I drive, windows down. Shorts and skirts are out and ready to be worn. All I want to do is run and ride bikes outdoors. I feel a need to go shopping because I need some bright colors in my wardrobe now! Yeah, I sound a little nutty right now but I don't care, this weather is fantastic!

Working on: More freebies for you guys. I really have fun making illustrations in my spare time, but I am thinking about making some blog freebies. Got any suggestions. I might start off with some social media buttons, because when I was redesigning my blog I really couldn't find any free cute ones out there in internet land so I ended up making my own. But yeah, if you got any cool ideas let me know. I might just make what you are wanting.

Thinking about: Traveling somewhere. As I am writing this I am waiting for my last class of the day and then my spring break officially starts. I'm not going anywhere but I am thinking of doing a little road trip. It honestly depends on my funds but I would really love to go visit a boy in Kentucky!

Anticipating: This Saturday! It's nothing too important but I have been waiting for three months for it. And I am not going to tell you guys about it ...yet! Honestly I doubt any of you will care but just for fun I am going to keep you on your toes! (I bet you guys are itching for more HA..joke)

Listening to: Keith Urban.. a lot. I am officially obsessed with his new song For You that is on the Act of Valor movie. Have any of you seen that yet?! Sadly I have been too dang busy to go to the movies but that is one that I must see soon! I just know I am going to cry/love it.

Eating: Cuties and basically any fruit in my house. Yeah, fruit is good for you but I eat it so much that I think I may be over doing it, if that's possible. For lunch today I ate two cuties, about a cup and a half of sliced strawberries and a peanut butter & banana sandwich. I just can't help myself when it comes to fruit.

Wishing: For two things actually, that this weather stays freaking amazing and somehow all my working out melts this inter tube of gross I have around my waist. Seriously! The pooch will not go away! I want abs!! Okay, I'm done.

-K